Dear everyone: please stop asking me when I am going to have a baby…..

Last night a friend asked me about my job and how it was going. I realized how nice it was to have someone acknowledge that right now, in my life, my job is very important to me and building my career is what I am focused on. In my life, my job is my baby right now. It was so nice to be asked that because honestly, it seems like the the only thing people ask me lately is when I am going to start growing a little life inside of me. I’m getting so sick and tired of being asked when I’m going to have a baby and of answering that question so politely when what I’d really like to say is MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS! A girl can only be asked that question so many times before she starts to lose it…….

Choosing to have a baby is a HUGE decision. I truly believe that you should be 100% certain and committed to parenthood before you purposefully conceive. I know that at this point in my life, I am too busy and too selfish to be the mother I would expect myself to be.  I don’t want to be an absent mother who resents her children and if I have them before I’m ready, I’m terrified that that will happen. I have some stuff I want to do and some goals I want to accomplish before my focus is shifted……

Many of my friends have children and I have four nieces and two nephews. I love all the little ones in my life very much and enjoy spending time with them and being an “aunty”. So don’t get me wrong, I like babies and children. What I don’t like is the societal expectation that since I am now married and closer to 30 than 25, I should just have a baby!

Are babies in my future? Perhaps. Do I want one right now? No. Do I want to have to explain to someone on an almost daily basis WHY I am not in a hurry to get pregnant? Hell no!

So please, I beg of you!  Stop asking me when I am going to have a baby. It will happen when Lee and I decide it is the right time and please trust that we will let you all know when that time in our life is upon us. Until then, no more baby talk!


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